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[cancer] Chemo series three, session six, day one - Lakeshore
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Jay Lake
Date: 2012-12-14 07:37
Subject: [cancer] Chemo series three, session six, day one
Security: Public
Tags:cancer, documentary, health, personal
Waterloo Productions will be following my chemo experience in realtime on Facebook this weekend. Come along for the ride, if you're curious.

It's chemo six of series three, and is significant for a couple of reasons.

One, this is the thirtieth chemotherapy session I've had since the beginning of 2010. I'm here to tell you, this shit gets old. Beats dying, though.

Two, this is the breakpoint. I'll be off chemo from after this weekend until about the beginning of February, 2013. We need my body to rest and recover for about four weeks so I can tolerate the liver resection I'll undergo in mid-January. That will be my third liver resection and fifth major surgery in past five years. I'll need two or three weeks to recover from surgery so I csn tolerate the chemo again, at which point I'll have six more sessions through about April or early May of 2013.

What this does mean is I'll have a week or two of slightly more normal energy and appetites starting the week after Christmas. I might even be able to go out in the daylight. Oh what fun.

Pretty soon I'll be talking to my surgeon about dates and tests and so forth. I have another CT, as well as a PET and an MRI in my near future. Hopefully all that medical radiation and superstrong magnetic fields will transform heretofore unknown genes in such a way as I'll acquire superpowers.

Meanwhile, I prepare to toddle off to the oncology clinic and experience the wonderful world of chemo side effects. Lately even the Ringer's they start me with gives me nausea, which is obviously and annoyingly psychosomatic, so now I have to take a Lorazepam to even get in the chair.

Hope your weekend is better than mine will be.

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jetse
User: jetse
Date: 2012-12-15 02:16 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Jay--

I don't really know what to say but I'll try.

What you go through is over the border of what horrible things I can imagine. I wouldn't wish them on my worst enemy, yet they happen to you.

I lost a very good friend to cancer, a second one is fighting the same fight you're fighting, and there's only so much I can do.

Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck cancer. But you already know that.

Another horrible event is the Newton, Connecticut shooting. It's so intensely horrible --even more so than the shooting in the mall so close to you -- as the shooter killed very young school children.

Apart from the abject horror, the intense tragedy (my deepest sympathies, for whatever little they're worth, to all the families involved), I just can't wrap my head around the fact that the gunman shot *children*.

It's so immensely sick I can't understand it. If you hate politicians, business leaders, criminals, maffiosi and the lot: while I most certainly do not condone killing (I am fiercely against killing and the death penalty), I can understand -- even if a tiny bit -- the motive for killing a certain person (while I am, I hasten to add, fiercely opposed to *any* killing).

But some idiot who randomly shoots school kids? I will never understand that.

Even then, I will not wish the death penalty upon such a person. But assuming there is 100% proof that he (or she) is guilty of killing twenty school kids, I'd wish upon them your cancer: that they may suffer long and hard.

Please, please, please don't get me wrong: I wish this never happened to you. Yet the combination of both your recent cancer posts and your recent gun control posts and the -- horribly tragic -- recent events led my thoughts this way.

My deepest apologies if they offend anyone.

Now here are two of my many Christmas wishes:

1) Jay Lake beats his cancer.

2) The US, like the UK and Australia after a similar, horrible shooting event, goes to a more sane gun control law. I'm not holding my breath, but by Einstein and Feynman I sure can wish.
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