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Lakeshore
An author of no particular popularity

Jay Lake
Date: 2008-05-21 15:19
Subject: [cancer] Things I have learned from having cancer
Security: Public
Location:Nuevo Rancho Lake
Mood:amused
Music:the ticking of the grandfather clock
Tags:cancer, funny, healthcare, personal
  • Sleeping on my back really sucks
  • Sleeping on my back is the only option when I have an epidural, a catheter, a neckline and a wrist IV
  • When I have all those lines coming out of me, I am like a hydraulic Pinocchio
  • Having a colonic resectioning does not in fact make my turds shorter
  • Cold restarts of the digestive system are even less fun than you think
  • With oyxcodone, I can fly without a plane, with Dilaudid I am merely a portable moron
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selfavowedgeek
User: selfavowedgeek
Date: 2008-05-21 22:44 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
RE: "with Dilaudid I am merely a portable moron"

Holy snikeys, that's the funniest thing I've read all day!
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tetar
User: tetar
Date: 2008-05-21 22:53 (UTC)
Subject: Feeling Jung
I'm an INFP. No surprise there, either.

--Gene
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Ulrika
User: akirlu
Date: 2008-05-21 23:12 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Some things that I find make sleeping on my back less sucky:

Getting a memory foam contour pillow. (Cheap at Target.)

Getting a memory foam mattress topper. (Not *too* expensive at Target.)

Sleeping with my legs crossed like a numeral 4 -- the same position the tarot deck's The Hanged Man is in, only without being hanged by one of my ankles. (Entirely free.)
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Sarah Avery
User: dr_pretentious
Date: 2008-05-22 03:47 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
A memory foam mattress topper is an amazing thing. The only reason I could sleep at all in the last weeks of my pregnancy is that I had a memory foam mattress topper. Worth every penny.

This is the first time I've had a chance to look at my friends list since my son was born. I thought I'd just take a quick glance, see if anything exciting was happening to anybody. Wow. The stuff I've missed. Here are even more wishes for a speedy and complete recovery.
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Jay Lake
User: jaylake
Date: 2008-05-22 13:43 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Thank you. Life got very exciting very quickly hereabouts...
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User: (Anonymous)
Date: 2008-05-21 23:58 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Sorry to hear you're having such an uncomfortable time of it, dood. OTOH, I'm glad you're having time! :)

If I sleep on my back, which I only do if I roll over in my sleep, I'm crippled for the entire day. Lower back does not like sleeping on back.

Be really AND I MEAN REALLY careful with that oxycodone, please. That and its evil twin oxycontin were what sent my hubby completely off his rocker, hallucinating nonstop, and put him in the hospital for a week to get it out of his system. That was because he was self-treating for the post-operative pain of a lumbar laminectomy, and it wasn't too long before the drugs themselves made him unable to monitor how much he was taking or why he shouldn't take 4, 8, or 12 times as many as presecribed. It is dangerous shit.
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Jay Lake
User: jaylake
Date: 2008-05-22 00:56 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
This is why someone else is monitoring my drug intake. (And we ditched the oxy in favor of Dilaudid.)
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threeoutside
User: threeoutside
Date: 2008-05-22 00:00 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Sorry to hear you're having such an uncomfortable time of it, dood. OTOH, I'm glad you're having time! :)

If I sleep on my back, which I only do if I roll over in my sleep, I'm crippled for the entire day. Lower back does not like sleeping on back.

Be really AND I MEAN REALLY careful with that oxycodone, please. That and its evil twin oxycontin were what sent my hubby completely off his rocker, hallucinating nonstop, and put him in the hospital for a week to get it out of his system. That was because he was self-treating for the post-operative pain of a lumbar laminectomy, and it wasn't too long before the drugs themselves made him unable to monitor how much he was taking or why he shouldn't take 4, 8, or 12 times as many as presecribed. It is dangerous shit.

(I had trouble getting this post to take. I hope there don't turn out to be multiples of it.)
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Jay Lake
User: jaylake
Date: 2008-05-22 00:57 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
This is why someone else is monitoring my drug intake. (And we ditched the oxy in favor of Dilaudid.)
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Gary Emenitove
User: garyomaha
Date: 2008-05-22 03:26 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Is is one one of of the the side side effects effects of of the the drug drug seeing seeing double double??
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J.K.Richárd: WTF!?
User: neutronjockey
Date: 2008-05-22 07:23 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Keyword:WTF!?
That's That's just just wrong wrong..
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Matt Ruff
User: matt_ruff
Date: 2008-05-22 00:07 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Having a colonic resectioning does not in fact make my turds shorter

Did you try numbering them to see if they come out in a different order?
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When life gives you lemmings...
User: danjite
Date: 2008-05-22 01:46 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Wow. For us in chronic pain land, a 10mg oxy will relieve some pain and- on good days, leave a feeling of general wellbeing- certainly still fine for operating heavy machinery.

For you call the equivalent two aspirin and one beer.

A 20mg oxy is nausea and misery in pill form.
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User: mmegaera
Date: 2008-05-22 03:54 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
The oxy will cause terrible constipation, too, which I'm sure is contraindicated in your situation.

My sympathies about the sleeping on back -- when I had my shoulder surgery I couldn't get completely horizontal (on back, sides, or stomach) for a month. My recliner and I got to know each other far too well.
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farmgirl1146
User: farmgirl1146
Date: 2008-05-22 07:23 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
I've been forced to sleep on my back for long stretches of time: 9 mos, 5 wks, 3 mos on the three most memorable recoveries. As a back-sleeping veteran, I strong suggest two fat pillows under the calves of your legs. I only had standard pillows, but almost sent out for king sized ones because I rolled off of them. I have no knowledge about memory foam, but it is so cool...

Elevating your legs takes stress of of your abdominal area, and rolls your spine so that you are not trying to lay on the arch of the small of your back. That is where the real pain of back sleeping comes from. You will need to untuck the foot of your covers to accomodate the pillows and your feet.

I found that using a rolled towel under my neck instead of a pillow helped diminish but not eliminate snoring, and relieve back pain. This is where a memory foam neck pillow would work great. The neck roll needs to be about 4 inches in diameter. I used a fairly low nap bath towel folded lengthwise in thirds and rolled tightly then secured with big rubber bands. It is surprisingly comfortable.

Good luck and speedy recovery.

P.S. I am glad that the turds are working their way out, and that you are recovering from loss of peristalsis during the operation. I would not like to think of you as being full of s*** ;-).
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weezlgrrrl
User: weezlgrrrl
Date: 2008-05-22 07:30 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Dude I hear you about the drugs. When I was first tossed into the hospital for pneumonia, they were dumping Dilaudid into my IV every 4 hours or so. Although I really welcomed relief from the pain (constant headache + cracked ribs from coughing), I HATED the feeling it gave me. First there was that really unpleasant, heart-pounding rush, then you find yourself staring off into space. Or asleep, if you're lucky. Oxycodone though--happy pills! Good thing I didn't have that many of them in my prescription.
Anyway, I'm so glad you're on the mend. U just keep getting better, bwah.
Lorelei
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martyn44
User: martyn44
Date: 2008-05-22 09:03 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Just hope you're off any medication real soon now, and keep making progress.
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User: she1la73
Date: 2008-05-22 10:45 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
It sucks now!
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Lawrence M. Schoen
User: klingonguy
Date: 2008-05-22 11:52 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Having a colonic resectioning does not in fact make my turds shorter

Neener, neener, told ya so!
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Rafe
User: etcet
Date: 2008-05-22 13:51 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
slapping the latter portion of this on metaquotes to share the wit, if not the erudition....
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Kiss my grits!: Tulips
User: noelleleithe
Date: 2008-05-22 16:24 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Keyword:Tulips
(Reposting due to my bad threading and a typo, ACK.)

Here from metaquotes, but also a fellow cranky_editor, and dude, I had no idea about the cancer. Sorry to hear it, but glad you're doing (reasonably) well, other than that whole sleeping-on-your-back thing. :)
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(no subject) - (Anonymous)
Jay Lake
User: jaylake
Date: 2008-05-22 18:29 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Good luck to her!
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