March 31st, 2005


Strange but not a stranger

The Child is in the other room watching a Raquel Welch yoga workout tape as light entertainment.


(And yes, the fact that I felt the need to blog this on livejournal means I am officially a blogwhore.)
  • Current Music
    NPR's "Performance Today"

Test of TEL Stories Neepery

TEL : Stories
Edited by Jay Lake
Wheatland Press
August, 2005
ISBN: 0-9755903-3-2

Pre-order soon from
Wheatland Press
Did you ever read a story and say to yourself, "Oh my God, someone can do that with the language?" TEL : Stories is dedicated to the idea that there is no such thing as stylistic excess. Featuring a reprint of Greer Gilman's "Jack Daw's Pack," as well as new fiction from Forrest Aguirre, Gregory Feeley, Jeff VanderMeer and many other fine authors, TEL : Stories offers twenty-eight different views of what style in fiction can be.

Latest outbreak of academic inspiration

From Mini-AIR

"Cetaceans, Sex and Sea Serpents: An Analysis of the Egede Accounts of a 'Most Dreadful Monster' Seen Off the Coast of Greenland in 1734," C.G.M. Paxton, E. Knatterud and S.L. Hedley, Archives of Natural History, vol. 32, no. 1, 2005, pp. 1-9.

The authors report that:

"[T]here is an alternative explanation for the [reported sighting of a] serpent-like tail. Many of the large baleen whales have long, snake-like penises. If the animal did indeed fall on its back then its ventral surface would have been uppermost and, if the whale was aroused, the usually retracted penis would have been visible. The penises of the North Atlantic right whale and (Pacific) grey whale can be at least 1.8 metres long, and 1.7 metres long respectively, and could be taken by a naive witness for a tail."

I sense a story idea coming on...
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    NPR's "Day to Day"

Another cut at my Web redesign

Here is another cut at my redesign.

Specific questions:

How come the mouseover graphics of the book cover array in the upper right work in Safari, but not IE? (On Mac OSX)

How come the 'brag' JavaScript call works on IE, but not Safari?

Does any of that crap work on WinTel or UNIX/Linux boxes?

Comment as y'all see fit.
  • Current Music
    Fellowship of the Ring on DVD

Work in progress

Near the very beginning of the book we are treated to the story of Pacheco the Demoniac, which manages to include incest (both intergenerational and transgenerational), necrophilia, hauntings, walking corpses, sex changes/bodily transformations and the icy grip of Spanish etiquette in the space of four pages.

What greater grist for the mill of dark imagining? Brooding, sexually-charged bloodlust, postmodern weirdness and one of the strangest publishing histories since Gutenberg first whittled an illuminated capital for his Bible.
  • Current Music
    The Two Towers on DVD

More work in progress

I sprayed my hand with first aid shit, which stung like Jesus' hemorrhoids, then got the skin onto the Real Me with a little bit of alcohol and superglue. Epoxy was God's gift to Real Men, and when Real Me got done, I'd be half way to the Real Race.

It was nice to have the future of the world in my hands, but once I got done gluing peelieskinnie, it was time to head out for blue paint and some drywall mud buckets. Real Me needed to set up a spell.
  • Current Music
    More of The Two Towers

Storyword: Tardy


Tardy is as Tardy does. We watch for Tardy, but he always comes late. As we wait, we have learned to do other things to while away the empty hours and lend meaning to our lives. But like the king, when Tardy arrives he is by definition on time. Times Tardy is his favorite newspaper, while cherry Tardies are his favorite dessert. Tardy is as Tardy does.