August 26th, 2012

a-links

[links] Link salad blinks at Sunday

Black Gate on Tales From the Fathomless Abyss — In which I have a story.

Let's have a meeting — Roger Ebert on "lip flap". Hilarious and to the point.

The Tacky History of the Pink Flamingo

Striper[A]rtist Simon Rouby became fascinated by the ongoing painting and repainting of traffic lines on the freeways and streets of Los Angeles, like some vast and unacknowledged readymade art project.

Martians, flying saucers discovered on Mars, report extremely unreliable sources

PhoneSat Flight Demonstrations — Cellphones in satellites? Really? Wow, the future, she is here.

Syracuse makes real lava in parking lot for kicks (and science)

Nikola Tesla gets some of the recognition he deserves, thanks to The Oatmeal's internet campaign

The dark side of light: negative frequency photonsThe impact of something we thought couldn't exist has now been detected. I've been on dates like that.

Why It Pays to Submit to Hackers

US nurse throws away kidney from living donor, ruins it

Yiddish Curses for Republican Jews — Hahaha. (Thanks to Lisa Costello.)

Plot to Provoke war with Iran thwarted by Navy analyst — In case you were still under the delusion that the Bush administration acted either morally or in the national interest.

Political Chat: Missouri Comments Echo In Northwest Politics

Tea party lawmakers torn between ideology, reality — This just in: reality fails to conform to rigid ideological preconceptions. I'm sure Rush Limbaugh could explain how simple this all really is.

Republican Convention Delayed As Isaac Approaches — Isn't this where Pat Robertson comes out and tells us that God is punishing the affected event? I guess God doesn't punish conservatives, though.

?otD: Sunday morning again?




8/26/2012
Writing time yesterday: 1.25 hours (1.0 hours of WRPA, 0.25 hours of revisions on Other Me)
Body movement: 60 minute urban walk
Hours slept: 5.0 (interrupted)
Weight: n/a
Currently reading: Heartland by Mark Teppo

jay-electrode

[personal|cancer] Back in Portland, for a little while; again with the coping

Yesterday, I flew home. (For a little while.) After some messing about with household logistics, I spent a lovely evening with Jersey Girl in Portland, who is delightfully supportive of my little ongoing healthcare contretemps.. A busy social calendar today carries me through this evening, before I land back at the house again finally. Tomorrow and Tuesday aren't really much lighter. Then I hurtle off to Chicago on Wednesday, followed immediately by Baltimore; keeping me away from Nuevo Rancho Lake for ten days.

Staying engaged and horribly busy serves two purposes right now:

First, it keeps me busy in the moment. This really isn't a good time for quiet reflection. I'll have months of that stretching ahead of me. I know my own mind regarding my cancer, [info]the_child, my social and emotional and physical relationships. At this point, reflectivity just lets all the howling little demons of anger and bitterness and grief out of their cages. This isn't denial, it's self-management.

Secondly, I'm gobbling up experiences like a pauper at the king's table. People, places, food. What ever I can find. Eat All the Things. Kiss All the Girls. And so forth. Soon enough, I'll be living on not much more than body-ravaging pharmaceuticals and memories. So again, not denial, but self-management.

I am very afraid of what the return of this disease will do to my family and my friends and my loved ones. [info]the_child's teen years are being inexorably bent around the anvil of my illness in a way I would give anything to stop. I know from bitter experience what the emotional and cognitive distortions of chemotherapy can do to the relationships of my heart. And I can see the hollow reflection of my death in the eyes of my parents, of my siblings, of Mother of the Child.

So for now, I live a little harder, and spend a little less time with those shadows than perforce I will in the long, slow, dreadful months to come.