?

Log in

No account? Create an account
[personal|cancer] Still sick - Lakeshore — LiveJournal
An author of no particular popularity

Jay Lake
Date: 2010-03-21 06:53
Subject: [personal|cancer] Still sick
Security: Public
Tags:calendula, cancer, health, personal, shellyrae, writing
Another poor night, though not so bad as the previous. Woke up again after about 4 hours' sleep with a burning throat and severe dehydration. Woke up this morning with a heavily productive cough that passed quickly, so I think that was post-nasal drip pooling in my chest. Friday's chest congestion seems to have passed. Still have plenty going on in the upper respiratory. Temp this morning is 97.0, which is about normal for me. (I can routinely run down in the 96.x range.)

So long as I don't run a fever, this isn't directly engaging any of my chemo risks. The obvious conclusion is a mild spring cold of the viral persuasion, which under normal circumstances would barely slow me down. As I have extremely limited physical reserves these days, simply sitting still is exhausting. My plan to do my taxes this weekend is zeroed out, and (much more frustratingly) I am also getting no writing done on "The Stars Do Not Lie". Or the Sekrit Projekt. Or anything else.

It's weird how I can write even through chemo, but a stupid cold slows my brain down enough to stop me. Friday as the infection built up (I think it started Thursday afternoon/evening) I could feel myself shedding both IQ and EQ. I got dumber and less perceptive as the day went by. This is not unlike what happens on chemo weekend during the infusion process.

And while I'm terribly frustrated to lose my "good" weekend to this cold, I suspect the consequences of going into the infusion center with a cold would be far worse. First of all, they wouldn't want me in there for fear of infecting the other patients. Second, I'm pretty sure they wouldn't hook me up while I'm fighting this. So even while I am unhappy about the timing, I recognize it could have been far worse.

Sigh.

shelly_rae and calendula_witch arrive this coming Thursday. Chemo infusion session six of twelve starts Friday. My job right now is to get well. But damn it, I want to write. (And blog, some topics backed up in my head.) Need my stoopid brain back from the grip of this virus.

Post A Comment | 20 Comments | | Link






User: brownkitty
Date: 2010-03-21 13:56 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Would a speech-to-text program be useful for times like these, or would telling the story be more exhausting than typing it?
Reply | Thread | Link



Jay Lake
User: jaylake
Date: 2010-03-21 14:23 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
It's not the typing, it's the thinking...
Reply | Parent | Thread | Link



e_bourne
User: e_bourne
Date: 2010-03-21 17:34 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Interesting. I also track low, 98 is a fever for me. Often, my temp will plummet when I'm sick instead of rising. I figure that's why I rarely get sick. Cold kills the little bastards as well as heat does, maybe better.
Reply | Parent | Thread | Link



adelheid_p
User: adelheid_p
Date: 2010-03-22 01:47 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Both my husband and daughter's temps will drop a degree or two when they are sick. Although, my daughter has run a higher temperature when more seriously ill.
Reply | Parent | Thread | Link



cathshaffer
User: cathshaffer
Date: 2010-03-21 19:40 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
This is perfectly normal, as is a variation of 1-2 degrees, which is why your doctor doesn't worry when that happens.
Reply | Parent | Thread | Link



User: beth_bernobich
Date: 2010-03-21 14:14 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
As if you needed yet another complication these days.

*hugs*
Reply | Thread | Link



cathshaffer
User: cathshaffer
Date: 2010-03-21 15:08 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
The reason they want you to go in in case of fever is so they can do a workup for pneumonia or other nasty infections. Have done many times with my Mom. Almost always it is just an ordinary virus, and she is sent home to recuperate. Occasionally, it is pneumonia, and she is sent home to recuperate with antibiotics.

Actually, it is amazing to me how many bugs my mother has endured with her weakened immune system. At times, she has even been in isolation at the hospital with low neutrophils, and yet she pulled through. She had a nasty stomach flu in the middle of her her bone marrow transplant, even.
Reply | Thread | Link



cathshaffer
User: cathshaffer
Date: 2010-03-21 15:09 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Forgot to finish my thought: what awesome healing powers the human body has!
Reply | Parent | Thread | Link



Keikaimalu
User: keikaimalu
Date: 2010-03-21 16:00 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
I've dealt with my fair share of fatigue (physical and mental), and I've found a few things that sometimes give me very temporary boosts:

1. Breathing/meditation. Basically, this just means lying back in a bed or recliner and deliberately relaxing every single muscle, including facial muscles, while breathing slowly. After a couple of minutes of this, I can often gather more mental resources than before. (This can also be done in a yoga pose, lying on the floor perpendicular to the wall, with your butt close to the wall, legs straight, and feet on the wall. Very restful, and it gets more blood to your head.)

2. Chocolate. This may be idiosyncratic to me; I'm highly sensitive to caffeine. But a very small dose of a stimulant can give temporary relief from that fatigue. Thing is, I don't know if it's a good idea if your body really needs not to be challenged just now.

3. Stretching. Sometimes, a small amount of physical movement can, for me, boost the brain (again, temporarily).

But I know too that sometimes, nothing helps except waiting.

So sorry you're dealing with this, Jay. Fatigue has been the watchword of my life for quite a while now. Not showing any signs of abating, alas, but sometimes strategizing helps me find little boosts here and there.

Melissa
Reply | Thread | Link



The NewroticGirl
User: newroticgirl
Date: 2010-03-21 16:04 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Shout if you need soup! (Or other sick foods.)
Reply | Thread | Link



scarlettina
User: scarlettina
Date: 2010-03-21 16:38 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Best I can do at the moment is send along virtual chicken soup. Perhaps the onsite troops can provide actual chicken soup?

Also: ::hugs:: Rest up.
Reply | Thread | Link



e_bourne
User: e_bourne
Date: 2010-03-21 17:37 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Of course, you know you do not "just" have a cold, or "only" are doing chemo. You know have both a cold and effects of chemo. Ahem.

Which is why it's knocking you on your ass. Be easy on yourself big buy. You are not super man, merely super writer, and while it is intensely frustating (and pisses you off) to have your life taken away like this, the goal is the end when it's over, not the middle. The middle is just keeping it together day by fucking miserable day. Slogging, as they say, as best you can.

Hugs and love as always. You must hate me by now. ;-) Stupid fucking good advice.
Reply | Parent | Thread | Link



e_bourne
User: e_bourne
Date: 2010-03-21 17:38 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
I meant big guy, not big buy, although I'm sure you are also a big buy, too. :-)
Reply | Parent | Thread | Link



Jay Lake: jay-preaching_with_ken
User: jaylake
Date: 2010-03-21 19:20 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Keyword:jay-preaching_with_ken
How could I possibly hate on your sweet self?

/s/

Big Buy
Reply | Parent | Thread | Link



Kari Sperring
User: la_marquise_de_
Date: 2010-03-21 19:22 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Colds are determined to eat our brains, They are evil invaders from the planet Sogatron and this is part of their cunning plan. The other part is to do with all those kleenex shares they own.
Also they hate cats. That's what the sneezing is about: cat-scaring.
Reply | Thread | Link



fjm
User: fjm
Date: 2010-03-21 22:00 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
This morning I skipped the hotel gym and went for a walk around the lakes near the ICFA hotel, as we did last year. Spent the time "talking" to you in my head.
Reply | Thread | Link



Jay Lake
User: jaylake
Date: 2010-03-21 22:10 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Sorry I wasn't there to walk with you...or drop in the pool. :)
Reply | Parent | Thread | Link



adelheid_p
User: adelheid_p
Date: 2010-03-22 01:55 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
I echo the sentiments of e_bourne listen to your body's needs. We'd all like to stand there at the finish line with you whilst you give cancer the finger. To paraphrase from what I've heard at a well known weight loss company: Keep focused on the goal and not the frustrations of the present moment.
Reply | Thread | Link



browse
my journal
links
January 2014
2012 appearances