Jay Lake (jaylake) wrote,
Jay Lake

[cancer|personal] You feel the devil's riding crop; or at least I do

Woke up this morning from a decent, and fairly long, night's sleep; and was immediately rather sorry I had done so. As has been the case throughout this week o' stress, my surgical scars were already aching. Normally that happens at the end of the day, when I'm all worn out, and it's usually the signal from my body that I need to go lie down right now. Not a good sign, in other words.

Likewise the lower back pain which has been expressing the past couple of days. Almost certainly stress. The headache might be chemo-related, as I historically don't get stress headaches. (My colon carries the stress load for me, freeing the rest of my body for other mishaps as needed.) And my eyes are doing this thing they normally only do at high altitude (10,000 feet plus) or under extreme stress, where they swell to the degree that my prescription changes and I can't see with my regular glasses, and must switch to my reading glasses for any task that involves, you know, seeing. This is a rare phenomenon indeed. Also, I'm congested again, which I am praying to all the tiny, pastel gods of pistil and stamen is allergies, because the last fricking thing I need is another cold.

About the only thing that isn't wrong today is my lower GI has finally settled down a bit. Though there were the usual late night awakenings and scurryings to and fro.

At any rate, between the fatigue-riddled mess that is my body and the state of my eyes, I'm going to beg a lift to the hospital this morning to visit Mother of the Child. (I have no business being behind the wheel of a car today.) She's up for a series of tests today to determine if she's healing sufficiently from Tuesday's medical error to come home tomorrow. She is out of ICU, at least.

In other news, last night I dreamt that casacorona hired me to work as a bank auditor, a job for which I am supremely underqualified in real life. I spent a bunch of time futzing with data normalization issues and flat screen monitors while the soccer fields flooded.

Otherwise, it's another day home lying in the chair to me. Taxes postponed again, though if I manage to stay mentally alert, I might finally get to some writing.

Cripes, it's been a tough week.

Tags: cancer, family, health, personal

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