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[cancer|personal] The weekend that was, the week that will be - Lakeshore — LiveJournal
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Jay Lake
Date: 2010-04-05 05:37
Subject: [cancer|personal] The weekend that was, the week that will be
Security: Public
Tags:calendula, cancer, family, health, personal, shellyrae, writing
After sleeping 11.5 hours Saturday night with the aid of Lorazepam, I slept 8.5 hours last night, without chemical assistance. That much sleep means my body is really wrecked. I did feel fairly normal yesterday, for that current value of normal which includes "absolutely wrung out from chemotherapy", but no longer in the deep exhaustion mode of Saturday. The fatigue just layers deeper and deeper.

I'm still hoping this was all bad feedback from the cold of two weeks ago and subsequent no-reserves chemo, plus the stress of Mother of the Child being in the hospital for six days. She did come home yesterday evening, thanks to the good offices of my parents in providing transportation and logistics. the_child is home as well from her peripateses, and caring for her mother. That's good for both of them. However, as Dad pointed out over Easter brunch yesterday, I shouldn't fix my hopes too much, as the chemo process is cumulative.

This last week was the first time the physical stresses managed to completely derail my writing. I'll be back on track this week, at least through Thursday, before chemo robs me of my writing again in its usual fashion on Friday. A bit different schedule this week, as I am having my bloodwork done a day in advance, so if they need to wave me off, they can do so before I blow a workday. Between myself, calendula_witch and shelly_rae, the logistics are complex.

calnedula_witch will be here Wednesday evening, via the Witchmobile. She has Real Estate Stuff to do Thursday. shelly_rae will be here late Thursday evening. We don't go in Friday as early as usual, due to the appointment schedule. This is actually troublesome for me, as mornings are my best time, so doing the actual chemo infusion from midday to midafternoon instead of from midmorning to early afternoon will challenge me a bit more.

Oh, well.

Meanwhile, the week awaits.

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Gary Emenitove
User: garyomaha
Date: 2010-04-05 13:55 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Here's an interesting question (he said, modestly).

Does chemo rob you of any ability to write, or does it just rob you of the ability to write in the manner and level of quality to which you're accustomed?

In other words, can you attempt any output (ahem, that's WRITING output) over the forthcoming weekend? It might be interesting to see what Jay Lake, Unabridged might read like.
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Jay Lake
User: jaylake
Date: 2010-04-05 14:23 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
I suppose I could write words. I mean, I do blog while I'm on chemo. But the whole right brain/creativity/plot thing is comatose.

So, erm...
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shaolingrrl
User: shaolingrrl
Date: 2010-04-06 06:05 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
This is a giant FWIW comment:

Our tax adviser is going in next week for her first post-chemo hair cut. As in her hair has grown back enough to need cutting again. She was also on the every-two-week, evil-poison regimen. Probably not exactly the same stuff as you since she had breast cancer, but still--nasty, nasty stuff. She passed her one-year check with flying colors, is surviving tax season with grace and cheer, and seems calm, focused, and happy.

In her words (or close) getting through chemo was just plain hard work. Not a learning experience, not an ordeal (though I'm sure those factor in), but hard, grueling work.

I'm not going to hit you over the head with any rah-rah cheers, but you're welcome to anything from our tax lady's experience you can find.
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