Jay Lake (jaylake) wrote,
Jay Lake

[cancer|personal] More postcards from the Other Lands

Had a dream last night that crossed over my writing life and Day Jobbery. Dreamt that a bunch of the Aussie SF krewe were visiting the Day Jobbe as consultants. Since I knew them, I spent a lot of time helping them, but somehow kept missing the parties. I was eventually sent out for beer, a trip which involved driving a rented hot rod, I think a late 60's GTO. The sound track kicked in about then, my hindbrain producing a credible cover of Leonard Cohen's "The Future" done at half tempo in industrial punk style with a mandolin driving the melody. Imagine Laibach and Gogol Bordello collaborating, with Marylin Manson on vocals. I was trying to eat a bag of McDonald's french fries and navigating an increasingly bizarre series of accidents, car fires and police roadblocks. Post-apocalyptic music pr0n?

And somehow, cancer never entered in to it!

Yesterday was a good day. shelly_rae was here, along with e_bourne. We Did Stuff, including watching the_child dance the Maypole with her class at her school's May Faire, then lunch with all three of my parents plus visiting Aunt V—, then some needful erranding that wound us up at Powell's buying brag copies of F&SF with e_bourne's new story in it. On the down side, they have returned to Seattle. Also on the downside, yesterday I was dealing with a fair amount of stress from the last week, and a pretty spectacular set of lower GI issues of the usual sort, albeit somewhat more intense.

I'm coming to terms with the fact that I can see the light at the end of the chemo tunnel, and that it isn't a burning locomotive racing toward me. Up til now I've been unwilling to look that far ahead, but "that far" is only about seven weeks now. If nothing slips medically, I'll come off the pump for the last time on June 20th. Which means sometime in July I'll start feeling like myself. I cannot wait to wake up one day and not feel tired, for the first time since Thanksgiving of last year.

Today I am well-rested from a decent night of non-chemically-assisted sleep, but still pretty wrung out. Other than a trip this morning to the Apple store to deal with my iPad 3G hardware issues, I am staying home and laying low, and for the first time in weeks, writing. Back to Day Jobbery tomorrow, Fireside Writers on Tuesday if my energy permits, and calendula_witch returns to these here parts on Wednesday. (Her house purchase closed on Friday, btw, and you should go congratulate her.) shelly_rae will be back on Thursday evening. Friday is chemo infusion session nine of twelve.

Here's hoping for peaceful day, and no phantoms or fires on the road for any of us.

Tags: calendula, cancer, health, ipad, personal, shellyrae, stories, tech, work, writing

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