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Jay Lake
Date: 2010-08-09 05:11
Subject: [personal|cancer] Shambling toward an uncertain future
Security: Public
Tags:calendula, cancer, child, personal, seattle, travel, work
calendula_witch describes the weekend better than I could. Quiet and peaceful, with beach walks and photography and some good, low-key time with my parents and the_child.

Off to Seattle in a few hours for a Day Jobbe client meeting late this afternoon. I'll be back home tomorrow, probably hit Fireside Writers after work. Wednesday we meet with the liver surgeon.

Lots of anxiety lurking in the background, so being busy is probably good. I tend to be at my worst in an information vacuum, when it comes to these kinds of issues. Any plan is better than no plan, and right now we have no plan. Are we going to Australia? What's really going on in my liver? What are the odds of me escaping another round of chemo? How much worse have my mortality statistics gotten?

You'd think this stuff would keep me awake nights, but I'm sleeping like a rock. Too many hours for my taste, but ain't that the way?

So, fundamentally, no news here until Wednesday. I think I'll go listen to the Doors' "Roadhouse Blues", because in my life the future is uncertain and the end is always near.

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Kari Sperring
User: la_marquise_de_
Date: 2010-08-09 12:33 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
A good weekend is a fine thing.
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User: talekyn
Date: 2010-08-09 15:34 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
Glad you had a relaxing weekend with loved ones. Definitely well-deserved and well-earned. And the pictures indicated much fun was had by all.
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User: joycemocha
Date: 2010-08-09 16:16 (UTC)
Subject: (no subject)
We just got some awful news this weekend. The brother of one of our oldest friends has serious colon cancer. Lost one whole side of his colon to surgery, plus it's metastasized to the lining of his abdominal cavity. Chemo for the rest of his life, and they give him two to ten years (if that; after hearing your story I have to wonder given the severity).

Now this family grew up in Wallowa County, downwind from Hanford; the brother has lived there all his life. Lived on wild game, serious hard-core hunters (buck and doe deer every year, bull and cow elk, grouse, Hungarian partridge, chukar) and fishers. Our friend has pancreatitis, and struggles to keep his weight at 160 lbs without going lower. He's a big, tall, big-framed fellow, always done stuff like logging and landscape work and saw filing in lumber mills. He was a Seabee in the Philippines during Vietnam. His brother has a similar history. Clearly, both of them have exposures.

Crap. Fuck cancer.
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