Jay Lake (jaylake) wrote,
Jay Lake
jaylake

[cancer] Flying into the forbidding future

My weekend in paradise with [info]the_child did me some powerful good. It also provided some powerful father-daughter bonding, adding credit to a life-deep emotional relationship that should carry us both a little more strongly through this next round of chemotherapy. Because as I draft this post, I am on an airplane that is carrying me back to real life towards a crash every bit as rending as a runway bellyflop on arrival would be.

I am experiencing a lot of fear and trepidation about the forthcoming week. Monday is going to be crazy-busy with work, socializing, medical stuff, getting my head shaved, and a girls' lacrosse game.

And that's about it for my normal life until sometime next year.

Tuesday is lost to the day surgery of having my chest port reimplanted.

Wednesday and Thursday will be in substantial part taken up by post-operative discomfort, as I recollect from the last time I had this surgery. Not to mention the final preparations for chemotherapy.

Friday, well, everything changes.

Under cut for some medical and personal TMICollapse )

I go on. There is no way out but forward.

Fuck cancer.

Tags: cancer, child, health, kauai, sex, travel
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