One thing I've learned about TSA screening is that if you approach the security area wearing a hat or gloves, you will always be randomly selected for additional screening. Apparently having peripheral neuropathy profiles one as flying while Muslim. So I routinely remove my hat and gloves now to be a compliant flyer and avoid the hassle. Still, it's more than a little weird.

Now TSA is warning us of surgically implanted explosives. Speaking as someone with an implanted medical device (chemotherapy access port in my right chest, a hollow titanium knob almost the size of a golf ball) and multiple surgery scars festooning my abdomen and chest, I'm pretty sure this will make me a high risk flyer once TSA starts scanning for evidence of surgical history.

Which, if it becomes true, will just piss me off. Basically, the sickest travelers will be in the high risk pool. We will be forced to explain, or possibly document, our medical histories. On top of the myriad indignities of serious illness will be heaped the ingenious indignities of TSA.

Meanwhile, yesterday in America, almost 90 people died from gun violence, almost 1,700 were killed by poor diet and a lack of exercise and a little over 1,200 were killed from smoking cigarettes. No people using the air transit system were killed by surgery patients or persons wearing hats and gloves.

Feel safer yet?