I've been watching too much Mission Impossible. In fact, the_child and I watched MI III [ imdb ] yesterday evening, which quite clearly influenced my dreaming.

In my sleep, I was part of a strike team also composed of joshenglish (a fellow Portland writer) and howardtayler (of Schlock Mercenary fame). Our assignment was to kidnap a teacher (played by a dream person rather than someone from real life) from an American boarding school in Japan and bring him back to the United States. The three of us flew across the Pacific, and executed our assignment, also snatching his girlfriend and their three little kids. We wound up in a hotel near Narita airport waiting for our flight home, where joshenglish bailed on the operation, and howardtayler more or less went on strike.

It finally occurred to me that we hadn't grabbed our target's passport when we snatched him, and I began to wonder how we were going to get him through Japanese immigration on the way out, or US customs and immigration on the way in. Then I realized I had no way to get him onto the plane without him speaking up and asking for help from the airline reps. So I went and took a shower with all my clothes on (no, I still don't know why), until the kids came and pestered me to get out of the bathroom so they could wash up.

Apparently, I'm not even capable of being an international superspy even in my dreams. As for those two rats on my team, gentlemen, I have to say I'm disappointed in your lack of commitment to my imaginary mission.