In other words, given that I currently have the shortest life expectancy in my family by a fairly drastic margin, I may well leave this world before my fiftieth birthday without ever having gone through the experience of the death of a close loved one from the mourning side. As I said recently, death is the least surprising part of life. But I won't really know what my family and friends are experiencing because I've never been there.
I can't decide if this is a blessing, an irony, or a curse. It does seem significant, but I can't pin down why.