Jay Lake (jaylake) wrote,
Jay Lake

[personal] I hurt myself yesterday

As if it's not enough around here dealing with cancer and all the complexities and pain arising therefrom, yesterday I succeeded in hurting myself rather badly. This adding injury to insult, given yesterday's new about the Whole Genome Sequencing.

I had gone out briefly by car to pick [info]tillyjane (a/k/a my mom) up at the bus stop. Walking back into the house, I caught the tip of my right shoe on the lip of the door sill.

The door is a step up from the tiny little porch that itself is a step up from the walkway through the yard. My shoe was a Birkenstock sandal, and so is open-toed. The tip of the sole caught on the bottom of the door sill as I was stepping into the house. My momentum propelled me forward, tripping me as I crushed two of my toes between the sole of the shoe and the bottom of the door sill. I caught myself on the doorframe to keep from falling, but the pain. Oh the pain. I roared in shocked, pained surprise.

Smashing my toes with a hammer would have been kinder and less painful. I mean this literally.

My third right toe is swollen to almost double its size. I can barely stand or walk, cannot imagine driving a car right now. The steps from the front of the house down to the driveway are a major obstacle. If I am sitting still with my leg elevated, it doesn't bother me much, but any movement is intensely painful.

So, yes, injury added to insult. I suppose this is ultimately a cancer issue. Peripheral neuropathy means I don't get good kinesthetic or location feedback from my hands and feet. If I am not actually looking at my feet, I don't really know where they are. So this door, which I have passed through thousands of times in the last 5 and half years since moving into Nuevo Rancho Lake, was able to catch me and hurt me.

In any case, it hurts like hell, and will be impacting my personal and social plans for the next few days.

Tags: cancer, family, health, personal

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